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Nicole's Blog

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S E V E N T E E N
RANDOM FACTS

well, i am 17 years old, aren't i?

ONE Nicole is random, like this section. TWO Even though she's been skinny half her life, she's currently getting fat, due to lack of exercise and her love of cheeeese!! THREE She's totally an Italian food person but loves some Western, Chinese zhi char, XIao Long Bao, American fast food and MIS dishes =)) FOUR Nicole likes music, really. She was so crazy over music she joined the Music Elective Programme which while was torturous, she gained something out of it. FIVE Right now, Nicole is listening to KPop (BigBang and 2NE1) while still going on about boybands, Hilary Duff and random Disney people, and obviously The Jonas Brothers. SIX Nicole is secretly pro-everything, I'm pro human rights, pro gay rights, pro cheese on hotdogs, pro we-shouldn't-have-exams-because-it-kills-trees, yup. Pro everything and pro AT everything. =D SEVEN Nicole loves her cheem sounding CCA - International and Strategic Affairs Council or ISAC for short. EIGHT But Community Service Club will always hold a special place in her heart, the volunteering spirit will always burn within Nicole!! NINE Nicole loves several teachers, namely, Mrs Koh, Ms Tan, Chen Lao Shi, Mrs Martha Tan, Ms Cheng, Mrs Chu, Mrs Susan Tan, Mrs E-von Lee, Mr Leong, Mdm Nora, Mrs Bok, Ms Ng (both), Ms Teo, Ms Aw and Mr Tiew. TEN And Nicole takes these people as her role models: Obama, Ellen Degeneres, MM Lee Kuan Yew, SM Goh Chok Tong, PM Lee Hsien Loong, Ho Ching, Elim Chew, Mr Sng, Mr Low, Mr Ng, Ms Aw, Mrs Bok, Annabel Koh, Chan Li Wen, Tan Bao Jia, Alicia Ho and Sylvia Lim. ELEVEN Nicole eats. A LOT. Ask anyone who knows her, they'll tell you how much. TWELVE Nicole sometimes wishes for nonsensical stuff like that she was a guy, or world peace, or for people to just stop hating really. THIRTEEN This is an unlucky number, so I'm not gonna put anything here! FOURTEEN Nicole has a great sense of humour and cannot stand people who don't laugh. FIFTEEN Nicole has a sense of adventure and would love to travel all over the world someday, unfortunately due to her cold phobia, she'll have to strike half the world of her list. SIXTEEN Nicole is actually still 16, but decides that since her birthday is coming soon on the 18th of December, she will fake that she's 17. SEVENTEEN
Nicole does not understand why everyone wants to remain at 17 because she desperately wants to drive and buy her dream car (Ferrari Aurea Spyder), thus she would rather remain 21 forever.

T A G B O A R D

yakkity yak yak

Life

4:13 PM - Saturday, March 13, 2010

Percy Jackson was awesome. Seriously Logan Lerman is HAWT. But sighs, that was but an escape from the harsh reality that surrounds me. Oh well.

I remember that day, I was talking to Jie Zhi about our class people and how they're all dieting and eating healthily. A bit too healthily in my opinion. lols. And I told him that my motto is Live Fast, Die Young.

Jie Zhi then asked me:"Huh, why would you want to do that? Don't you want to do something meaningful with your life?" I then stared at him and he finally figured out what I was trying to tell him "Oh... That's right, you do loads of community work, that is meaningful I guess." Which I admit is true, that is one thing that I'm proud of in my life, but there are other things.

I've always wondered what it would be like to die, part of the whole homo sapiens' morbid fascination with death I guess. And most of all, what I really want to know is if anyone would mourn my passing. Not counting family of course, because that's like part of their duty in anycase. But I would like to know if anyone else outside of my family would bother to come, because that would tell me whether or not I've achieved something in this life.

At this ripe old age of 17 and 3 months, I feel I have achieved a fair bit of things. Let's go through them shall we?

Academically:

Admittedly, this is one area I can't say I'm particularly proud of. I have been a slacker for pretty much all of my life, and if I dig deep, I can say that its because I take some things for granted, or life has been too easy for me.

However, I guess I can say that getting into GEP has to count for something
Getting into Dunman High also has to count for something
Getting into the L class has to count for something and
Getting A2 and B3 for HCL and MEP respectively definitely counts for something

Dreams:

I used to dream of being a writer, and I have achieved this in some way, I've co-authored a thesis in CHINESE for a NUS mentorship program and its been published. I've also written fanfic online and published it and received encouragement and praise.
I used to dream of being a lawyer, defending my clients. Now I refuse to consider being a lawyer but if you look at my CCA choice - ISAC, I can see it as a realization of this dream in another way. I'm taking part in MUNs and ASEAN+, defending my country's stand. I'm debating issues based on laws, technicalities and various other components. So I can say that this dream has been realised as well.
I used to dream of being able to rough it out in the wild. For this dream, I have to thank my schools for allowing me to be able to do this. Tao Nan - for introducing me to SPARKC, which was the primary school version of OBS, it was awesome and it prepped me for worser stuff to come. Dunman High - for bringing us on adventure camps, especially the one at Kota Tinggi, that was amazing and I enjoyed it TTM.
I wanted to travel around the world. As of now, on family trips, I have been to Malaysia, Indonesia, Japan, Korea, Taiwan, USA and Australia. Considering that I'm 17 only, that is quite a lot of places, for that I'm grateful as well.
I wanted to be knowledgeable!! (I know, what a nerdy dream right -_-) I think now, as a result of ISAC, GP and my own interest in current affairs, I do know a lot. As a result of family trips, I have gained exposure to other cultures and to things that I would never have known if I were here in Singapore only. The woman calls me a know-it-all, I personally think no one can ever know-it-all but since she says so, I'm gonna take that as evidence this dream has been realised too.

Social:

I want to think that my friends are gonna turn up at my funeral, even if its to spit on my coffin. Because that still means I've made an impact, regardless of whether its positive or negative. If its positive, then I'm glad that I've managed to do that for you. If its negative, then I'm happy to have been a example of what-not-to-do.
I think I've quite a wide circle of friends and some closer ones. Some who embarrassingly know all about the dumb things I've ever done and some who only see the side of me that I allow them to see. I sincerely hope the first group will turn up, because thats the group that have seen me, all of me, and they have to decide for themselves whether I truly am worthy of their mourning. Because make no mistake about it, I have a gazillion flaws. If you wanna know how many, go ask the woman.

Personal:

I think as Jie Zhi mentioned, I am pretty proud that I have managed to discover this facet of life that has so much meaning and brings so much joy to my life. I thank Mrs Koh for that and Ms Tan for giving me so many opportunities, for grooming me. I am lucky to have found an outlet for my energy and I feel happy knowing that with the community work I have done, I have definitely made an impact on society, whether it is acknowledged or not. I'm glad I joined YVIP, because it really was the most awesome camp ever. It opened my eyes, and welcomed me into a huge family of people. Although I regret not going back to help, I do feel that if I ever needed their help for a project, they would oblige. =)
Right now, my goal is to become a psychologist or a sociologist, or a political scientist. Whatever really, as long as I can study people/social systems and figure out what makes them tick. This would help me to help others in society. That really is my main goal: To give back to society. I think in a way I have achieved this, through being a mini-mentor/counsellor of sorts. I may not be the best, but I have tried and on occasion succeeded, whether through pure brute force or not. And by brute force I mean nagging at that person until I break down their barriers. Not like violence or anything. I'm not about to name those people, but I think they know who they are. I wanna thank you all because I have gained so much from interacting with all of you.

And after looking at this list, I realised that it really isn't the length of lives that matter, but it is the depth. I thank you all for allowing me to live such a long enriching and invigorating life. And no, I'm not planning on committing suicide lols. I realise it kindof sounds like one huh. Just counting my blessings if you may. =)

P.S. I miss you already.